This is an update on my life and what's been happening to me -health-related, and mainly an explanation to why I wasn't able to update my website and post daily yet, and when will I start. And of course, my new year best wishes for you, my favorite people.

Hey loves! 
This is my very first article (other than a vegan recipe), ever since the website went live. So first of it all, happy new year to all of you! May 2018 brings you health, love & happiness!
Thank you for all your wishes, love you all so much! I’m sorry I haven’t been able to reply or been on social media ever since the new year.

Why am I not active on social media ever since the New Year?

I’m currently struggling with my endo and trying to manage the pain, fatigue, bloating and more. Ever since January 2nd I hardly was able even to stand, and still have to spend most of my time in bed, and girl, let me tell you, not an enjoyable time catching up on my favorite series, but hard times facing extreme pain, high fever, fatigue, vomiting and else. And the worst of the month has yet to come, as I'm still waiting for my period to show up this month.
This is why I'm not on social media for days, and also the reason why I didn't answer your Snapchat, DM, or emails if you did send me one of those.

Why isn't the website frequently updated, and when will it be?

This month is a big month for me, hard and not enjoyable one, and yet I've been waiting for this month to arrive for so long. The pain and malaise I have to go through at least two weeks a month is something I can't even explain and goes beyond words. Endometriosis is a condition that can't be treated for now, but surgery can help relieve the pain for a few weeks, or months, and might help your uterus be ready to welcome life!

This is why I won’t be much on my platforms this month. I’m having a bunch of different medical tests to run all month for the surgeons to get ready for the surgery, at the end of this month. I’ll try to keep you updated as much as I can, but I will anyway open up and share about my struggle with endometriosis & surgeries as soon as I’m back on my feet after the surgery & back to Dubai.

Why did the website go live if I wasn't ready?

I had so much planned for you guys that I was supposed to start in December, as I should have gotten back to Dubai that time, to my partner & team. But my health worsens, and I must put my health first as the pain has become unbearable for months now and only keeps getting worse.

How bad has the endometriosis spread so far?

The endometriosis is spreading so fast in all my body & started to develop on some of my vital organs a few months back and has attacked 3 of my bones since the New Year.

A baby on the way?

I want to see my longtime dream, to become a mom, realized this year. Unfortunately, as endometriosis often messes with fertility, especially at my stage, my baby's daddy an I are very likely to need medical assistance to create a new life.

How 2017 was one of the worst years for me personally & professionally?

I frankly had one of the worst years of my life. Fighting this condition and yet getting worse every day. I had to spend almost all the year in France for medical reasons, far from my hubby to be. I only fell like I was missing out on so much, in my personal life and beyond all professionally. Not being able to take good opportunities and losing contracts with brands I was excited to work with. Or accepting the deal and often losing their trust because I was almost never able to catch up on my work due to constant physical pain, chronic fatigue and a non-stop fever from my body fighting 24/7 all the inflammations in & on most my organs.

Why am I excited and happy for a month full of medical tests and a 10 to 12 hours surgery with weeks of recovery?

I’m finally in good hands, with new doctors that are listening, understanding and ultimately took control and try to help me and support me. After my next surgery, I’ll officially move in for good with my fiancé, in one of my favorite cities, and start a family.

My professional projects?

Not being stopped by my endo is a dream coming true! I know that getting pregnant might not be easy and that I might need a heavy treatment, and IVF, but it should be less painful for now and until the pregnancy if everything goes as smooth as we hope. I will be much more present on social media and will post daily or at least every two days on my website. 
I was signed with one of the biggest agency in UAE as model and talent, and I built up a team mainly based in the UAE, and we are getting ready to start a few of the projects coming this year, as soon as I am in Dubai. 

In short, so what's next?

After the surgery at the end of the month, moving house and starting a family, first part of my wedding (I'll talk about this some more soon), daily updates on my website, being much more active on social media, a YouTube channel, starting my business and much more!

A YouTube channel?

Unfortunately, way too many girls all around the world are also struggling with endometriosis. No matter how bad is it and what stage you're at, it's always frightening to know that you have a disease that can't be treated (but will!), and that affects your daily life. I hope to be able to raise awareness for endometriosis through my website, and videos, and even more importantly, I would love to show girls and women that are suffering from endometriosis, that you are not alone. I will share my experience and stories with endo and will take you with me on my pregnancy journey.
Beyond the illness, I'll post fashion, beauty, fitness, vlog, and vegan/food videos.

When?

I can't give you guys dates yet, but I can say that as soon as I will have recovered from the surgery, and have arrived in Dubai. I hope in the course of February!

Again loves, I wish you a very happy new year! May all your dreams come true, focus on your goal, be kind to one another, laugh a lot, and don’t forget that no matter what you have to go through you are as strong as everyone else and you can do it all, just go for it!

With love, 

Joanna xo